Take the Chance

Unless you believe in reincarnation, the lives we are living right now are our one-and-only shot at this world. As such, I continue to be amazed at how timid we can be – myself included – in so many facets of our lives. How many times have we not taken the risk… to share our idea in a meeting… to ask that person out… to stand up and sing a solo… and the list goes on. Inertia can a cruel master hidden behind a gentle hand as it is so easy to just stay the course.

A wise person once said that no true learning comes without pain. The pain could be the effort we have to put forward or something we must sacrifice or even to look like an idiot. But the price we pay for something often determines its worth to us. If you live a life of quiet blandness, you may likely be missing out on something amazing.

There is also the real possibility of making foolish decisions in a misguided attempt to be bold and to “live life to its fullest.” This post is not about making stupid choices (er, mostly… you can make your own judgement about my story below). There are times when it makes sense to say “no thank you” to an opportunity. But if the only reason why we say “no” is out of fear of failure or embarrassment, then those are the times that we need to most challenge ourselves.

I’ll offer an example from my life when I followed this advice and am eternally grateful that I did.

I was in my mid-20’s, single with not a lot of responsibilities outside of work when some buddies got the idea that we should all try skydiving. As someone who has a healthy fear of heights, I wasn’t overly enthusiastic about the idea but time and testosterone won out and I agreed to join the fun.

The fateful day arrived and a small group of us traveled over an hour to the nearest skydiving facility. Fortunately, as complete novices, we were making what is known as a tandem jump meaning we were attached to a more experienced diver and were basically just along for the ride.

After we arrived, we went through “orientation and training” <ahem> and finally went to pay our fees. At the last minute, I decided to spring for the extra $40 to have someone video my jump as I figured a) no one would ever believe that I’d done this, and b) I was never, ever, ever going to do it again. And then up in the plane we went.

Much to my surprise, I experienced absolutely no fear when we reached 10,000 feet and they slid the plane door open. Perhaps it was because we were so high up that it no longer seemed real or, just maybe, my excitement overrode my natural fears. Whatever it was, I had a successful jump and walked away with the video proof of my temporary insanity.

As luck would have it, the airfield was maybe a half hour from my parents’ home and so I had decided to spend the rest of the weekend visiting them and some old friends. One thing I hadn’t done before the jump, however, was tell my Mom what I was going to do. Yes, it turns out that I was more afraid of her than I was to jump out of the plane.

The weekend passed pleasantly enough and right before I was going to head home, I asked my parents if they wanted to see the video of my jump. They agreed and I put it up on the TV. As it ended a few minutes later, my Mom turned and glared at me. She didn’t say a word but the look in her eyes made it clear that if I ever did anything as stupid as this again, she’d kill me herself. The big smile on her face, however, also told me she was proud that I had faced a lifelong fear.

I said my goodbyes and started on the long drive home as I was going on vacation with some friends the next morning.

A week later, right after I got back, I received a frantic call from my Dad. Mom had had an aneurysm and was in the hospital, unresponsive. She remained in a coma for two more weeks and then gently passed away having never regained consciousness.

While losing my Mom certainly hit me hard, I later came to realize that I could not have asked for a better final memory with her… of sharing that video and seeing both her fear for me (borne out of love) and her pride. I am so grateful of that memory, as well as for my trip to the airfield giving me a reason to see my Mom one last time.

We will all face any number of tragedies in our lives. It is inevitable. What we can control, however, is how we face the challenges and opportunities put before us. I am not suggesting you take foolish risks but I would challenge you to always question and to push yourself. You never know where those experiences will lead but, at a minimum, they will make for a far more interesting and rich life.

Know that I’m pulling for you!

PS. If anyone is interested in seeing said video, I offer it up for your amusement below….